Its a GUNFIGHT!

Light week this week, other obligations have kept me from spending too much time online, but I wanted to post at least 1 (maybe 2) more things before the week is through. The other will be on Friday, which will be a fun twist on High Noon.

But for now.....Gunfight, by The Mighty Underdogs, is the weird (truly) story of two bad men who used to be friends, now meeting in the town square to settle a grudge. You see one man went to prison for the other and is non too happy about it....only blood can settle this.

This flash animated music video by Ben Stokes was done in a watery, surreal tone. Characters flow and wiggle even when they aren't doing anything but standing around....limbs bend in the wrong direction, and the camera never stops moving; pictures from old photographs, and pulp novels give the characters their faces and bodies and the whole thing is set to a hip/hop beat to create a VERY weird, and yet very fun, ride.

See for yourself, pard:

Cowboys vs. Aliens?!!............yawn.........

This is supposed to be a movie. Robert Downey Jr. has signed on to star and this is supposed to eventually be turned into a movie. So I thought, Cowboys and Aliens that sounds REALLY fun! They certainly thought it was good enough to make a movie out of it...So I bought it.....

I read this on a plane going over to Japan, in about 20 minutes (Its a fast read, and I'm a slow reader)

I hate to say it, but it sucked....

Imagine that really cool sounding movie from the 1980s that you watch thinking it is going to be fun, and turns out to to be boring and formulaic, (Strange Days comes to mind for me, "you mean the friend did it? Ooooo big surprise!") That's Cowboys and Aliens.

It reads like it was already made to be a movie, they already had figured out where the first and second plot points went, and what the final battle was going to be....but they forgot to tell an intriguing or even an original and interesting story. Everything just kind of happens the way you expect it too, and then its over. This is sort of the Valley of Gwangi with aliens, without the great Harrihausen stop motion and without an ounce of fun.

The story in a nutshell:

In the Old West, settlers and Native Americans wage a bloody battle for control of the land. But when the Earth is threatened by conquerors from the stars, these sworn enemies must work together to save all humanity.

I wont spoil it for you but, not surprisingly, the Cowboys win......(Sorry I just lied about not spoiling it)

The artwork was another point of annoyance. I don't know what it is about comic books artists, but when you see a professional draw a page it looks good, REALLY good. When you see someone who WANTS to be professional (but doesn't have the chops yet) everything looks sloppy and uneven...it LOOKS like a wannabe comic artist drew it.....that's what this book looks like. Boring story, bad artwork, 2 strikes against it...the only thing saving it is the idea which would have potential in the right hands.

Hopefully the movie will take the idea and turn it into something fun, but until then I have to give this:

1 out of 5 Alien Laser Six Shooters

...Its Only a Trick of the Light...

The Haunted Mansion goes Weird West at Disneyland Paris.

Based on the uber-popular Haunted Mansion attraction at the Stateside (and Tokyo) Disney parks, Phantom Manor takes the the dark ride attraction and pluses it into a great Old West ghost story. While at the same time it tries to inject a plot that isn't there in the other parks......with limited results.

The Bride, while a staple of the attic scenes in the HMs, is in the forefront here, as the sympathetic heroine trying to escape, and save us, from the evil Phantom.

Originally, Vincent Price narrated as the Phantom, this attractions "Ghost Host", acting as our tour guide into the dank, dark halls of the crumbling long abandoned mansion. However, Price's English narration was replaced fairly soon after the attraction opened with actor Gérard Chevalier's more region friendly French narration.

The music by John Debney is gorgeous. Debney took the Haunted Mansion music, and expanded it into full lush orchestral score that really turns this almost into a tragic operetta, including scenes of the Bride (and other characters) accompanying the music with juxtaposed singing.

The layout of the ride is the same as Disneyland's, with a tour around the most haunted parts of the manor...however the one place it deviates is the Graveyard...and instead takes guests into Phantom Canyon, a literal "Ghost Town" inhabited by the spirits of residents who died in a devastating earthquake that destroyed the whole town....of course, like always, singing and merriment are present.

Here is a really well edited ride thru I found, Enjoy!

Super Awesome Kung Fu Cowboy!

While not a Weird West band like Ghoultown, Muse did do a GREAT Weird West video called Knights of Cydonia that is equal parts Awesome and hilarious!

Taking place in a post-apocalyptic Old West, the video's main character...a kung fu Cowboy, goes around being awesome, until he is beat down by the awesome-r villain, and has to rebuild himself for the final confrontation...all in bad (meaning: great) Spaghetti Western style. If you haven't seen this, and you love cheese, it won't disappoint!

Charles Bronson hunts....The White Buffalo!

I guess the 1970's was a renaissance for Giant Animal and Predatory Animal movies. You had Jaws, Orca, King Kong, and this movie The White Buffalo starring Charles Bronson, Jack Warden, and Will Sampson as Crazy Horse.

The story is pretty good, Bronson plays Wild Bill Hickok. Hickok has been having dreams about a giant white buffalo that attacks him in a snow field. Every night, as it charges him, he tries to shoot it dead and every night he wakes up to find himself firing his guns into the ceiling. The dreams could be the result of his Opium addiction (which the film doesn't actually address) but more likely its a premonition, and so Bill takes it upon himself to hunt down and kill the REAL White Buffalo he believes is out there. On his journey he is joined by Crazy Horse and a mountain man named Charlie Zane, played by Jack Warden.

The films drawbacks are its low budget 1970s ness....and because of that, the effects are a little cheesy. The white buffalo itself, while not At The Earth's Core bad did look a bit puppet-y, some of the sets looked sound stagy, especially the final snowfield battle, and as much as I love Charles Bronson, he has never looked good in a mustache...sorry. Give me Harmonica anytime.....and the film just isn't very well directed. I COULD see this as a fun Saturday afternoon at the movies kind of film (the sort that you saw when you were a kid) if it wasn't kind of.....boring. Of course on repeated viewings boring films have been known to turn around to better films (great example Dick Tracy), so I would be interested enough to give it another chance.

After seeing the trailer I was hoping the film would surprise me, and in one way it really did, the score by John Berry is gorgeous and dark, the opening of the film with its almost Spielberg-ian/John Williams-ian/Raiders-ian feel made me promises it just couldn't keep later on.

Good Weird Western movies are truly hard to come by. In other media, there are weird western masterpieces, but for some reason movie always have a hard time of it. While certainly not the worst example of the genre Ive ever seen (That honor goes to Legend of the Phantom Rider) It isn't one of the best either...simply midway. Unfortunately this films earns:

3 out of 5 Giant Buffalo Tracks

"A story that will stick to ya, like an eyeball to a cactus needle"...

I remember Grim Prairie Tales back in the early 90s. It wasn't very scary, but it was a lot of fun.....I've just re-bought it, and a review is forthcoming, but until then, here is the trailer for a sample of whats to come:

"Sheriff Moses Stone has a good life in Bollas Raton: a good job, a loving wife, and a reputation that helps him keep the peace. Once a legendary bounty hunter, "Holy" Moses doesn't chase bad men across the wilderness anymore. At least, not until the outlaw El Diablo pays a harrowing visit to his town.

In the aftermath, the sheriff and his posse track down the shadowy fugitive through the high desert to Halo, New Mexico. But even a $10, 000 reward can't explain Moses Stone's zeal to bring down the particular lawbreaker. Something more has drawn him to the little town of Halo - a secret that wont die, no matter how much blood is spilled."

Written by Brian Azzarello and art by Danijel Zezelj, and loosely based on the DC Comics Western character El Diablo is REALLY good. I'm always up for a good comic book Western (Heck I'm always up for ANY kind of Western) and this one delivered. Sort of a Spaghetti Western/Weird Western hybrid, El Diablo is one of those series that starts off fairly light, and then gets dark really quickly and doesn't let up.

It has clever twists and turns that will keep you thinking until the final page, as Moses Stones' actions throughout the series catch up to him in the end.

Danijel Zezelj's thick lined artwork sometimes channels the decayed over xeroxed look of Spaghetti Western artwork, yet never becomes lost in a bog of muddiness. I'm a little biased though, being a fan of Zezelj's artwork...especially Congo Bill, Loveless, and various short stories. Its definitely edgier then your normal mainstream work.

If you get a chance you should ride out and pick up a copy.

4 out of 5 Bloody Spurs